Iris
by goth4ever
Summary: Falco is leaving again, but will Fox be able to hold himself together until he gets back? Angst! I do not own Star Fox!
1. I'll Set You Free

Falco stuffed his hands in his pockets and frowned. He peeked into the kitchen to see all of his team mates playing a card game and laughing happily. His eyelids lowered some more as he leaned his shoulder against the wall. Sighing through his nose, he walked out into the kitchen.

"No! No! That's cheating!" Slippy shouted.

"Nuh uh~ Totally in the rules," Fox said with a grin as he pulled a pile of money towards him, "You guys should just give up now. I'm kicking you _asses!"_

"Oh aren't you a cocky one," Krystel said a bit bitterly as she leaned back in her seat.

"I think he has a right to be cocky," Peppy said, pointing to the pile of money in front of Fox, "He has at least two of my pay checks in his pile,"

"Oh yeah baby~" Fox said with wide grin, "Ok ok, I'll buy the next shipment of liquor, if that makes you feel better,"

"It does," Kystrel said, picking up a bottle of beer and taking a swig.

Fox laughed but looked up when he saw Falco walk in, "There he is! Where've you been man? Didn't you get the e-mail? It's poker night!"

Slippy turned around to look at Falco, "You need to put Fox back in his place. He's taking everyone's money! I think he's cheating!"

Falco continued to frown. He stopped near the table and rubbing the back of his ankle with the top of his other foot, "Fox," he said, motion with his head back towards the hall, "I need to talk to you,"

Fox's cocky grin fell at that and he blinked, "Oh, sure thing," He set his cards down and stood, frowning. He glanced at everyone but they all shrugged, frowning too. Fox followed Falco back down the hall and into his room. Fox turned around and looked at Falco, "What's up?"

Falco closed the door and kept his hand on it. He looked down, keeping his other hand in his pocket. He was quiet a long moment before speaking, "I'm going," he said quietly.

"Going where?" Fox asked, tilting his head.

"No, I'm leaving," Falco lifted his head but still didn't look at his friend.

Fox's eyes widened some, "Again?"

"I gotta go and find myself. I'm becoming someone else. I don't even know that face in the mirror looking back at me,"

Fox took a step forward, "But Falco, you're _you_. You're nobody else!"

Falco shook his head and turned his head away some more, "I'm leaving,"

Fox frowned deeply, his tail lowering to brush the ground. He looked down and off to the side as he moved his arms to hold his elbows. He knew there wasn't anything really left to say, but it hurt when he would leave like this. He felt like he was a failure at being for friend to him. He sighed and closed his eyes, "Just know I'm here whenever you need me. I'll wait for you," he said quietly, "I'll let you go and set you free," he took a breath, "And let you be who you want to be. But... when you find you, come back to us; me. Or... or I'll find you and I'll kick your ass so hard, I'll send your Arwing spinning!"

Falco glanced up at him, not moving his head much, then looked away again."Heh," he sounded, giving a small smile, "I don't doubt it," He sighed, his smiling falling again, "Tell the others, ok? I don't know when I'll be back, but I will,"

Fox opened his eyes some, his tail swaying back and forth slowly and low to the ground. He rubbed the back of his neck, keeping his other hand under his other elbow, "Yeah, I got chya,"

It was quiet between them for a long moment, but Falco then opened the door and walked out, closing the door again behind him. Fox stood there a moment, letting his ears fall back and laid flat. He just stood there for an amount of time he didn't know. He took some deep breathes to help lock away the wash of emotions that threatened to hit him hard then walked out too.

Stuffing his hands back into his pockets, Fox walked back into the kitchen.

"What happened?" Krystel asked, leaning forward to rest her elbows on the table. Fox walked back to his seat and plopped down. He slouched in his chair then ran a hand up through his fur.

"Fox?" Peppy said gently.

Fox took a deep breath before speaking, "Falco's leaving," he said quietly.

Slippy's eyes widened, "Again? We have to go and stop him!" he shouted and stood up.

"No!" Fox said firmly, giving him a very serious look, much different from the happy and playful look he had moments earlier, "No one goes after him, that's an order, understand?" Nobody said anything and Slippy sat down again quietly.

"Why did he leave?" Krystel asked softly.

"Tch," Fox looked away, "Why does he always leave? He says he has to go and 'find himself''," his voice was filled with bitterness. He balled his hands into fists in his pockets.

Peppy frowned as he watched Fox but slowly stood, "I think we should go to bed now. It's getting pretty late," he said quietly.

Krystel looked up at Peppy then back at Fox. She reached over and put a hand on his arm, "Fox-..." she started but Fox snatched his arm away from her.

"Leave me alone," he told her.

Kystrel frowned more but sighed and stood. Slowly, everyone left the kitchen. Fox sat in his chair for a long time after. He grabbed a bottle of whisky not far from him on the table and took a swig of it, hoping it would calm his emotions.

After a while, he had drank just about the entire bottle. He wandered down the hallway, not noticing Peppy standing just outside his room. Fox swayed a bit, having a bitter look on his face. He put his hand on the wall and paused a moment but then walked right past Peppy and into Falco's room. Peppy frowned and turned, following him.

"Fox?" he said as he slowly opened the door. He found the younger man curled up on Falco's bed and under the covers. Peppy walked over to him and gently took the bottle from him. He turned to leave but stopped when he heard a small voice.

"What's wrong with me?" Fox said, just over a whisper. Peppy turned back around and looked at him. Fox's eyes were open slightly. Fox gritted his teeth and gripped the pillow with his hand tighter.

"Nothing's wrong with you, Fox," Peppy said, setting the bottle down and walking back over to the bed. He sat on the edge of it.

"Yes there is!" Fox shouted, gripping the pillow tighter and clenched his eyes shut, "I can't do anything right! Wh-what kinda person am I if I can't even help my b-best friend?"

Peppy put a hand on Fox's shoulder but Fox yanked away. Peppy folded his hands in his lap instead, "Fox, what Falco does isn't never your fault. This is just something he has to do by himself,"

"B-but I'm his best friend, god damn it!" he punched the pillow with the side of his fist, "I sh-should be able to help him with anything! Anything! A-and I can't! What if he doesn't want to be my friend anymore?" Peppy could see the alcohol start to affect the fox now. Fox's eyes were starting to water and his voice was shaky and slightly higher pitched.

"You two will always be friends. Falco just has trouble finding out what his purpose in the world is," Peppy said quietly.

"H-his purpose is to be my friend! And I'm supposed to be his! Aren't best friends supposed to t-talk to each other about everything?"

"Yes, but some things are hard to talk about, especially for someone like Falco. He doesn't like to show weakness, and to talk to someone about something like that, even to you, is hard for him. It's remarkable he tells you that he's leaving at all, or lets you care for him when he's ill. I don't think he would be here today without your friendship,"

Fox was quiet a moment and he sniffled hard, "I-It's just... It's just hard, because... I tell him everything, but he doesn't tell me everything... S-sometimes, I feel like I don't know him at all! I'm such a failure!"

"Oh Fox... don't say that,"

"No! It's true!"

Peppy sighed softly, "Fox, think about this... If Falco didn't treasure you as a friend, would he ever come back when he went out and did this? If he didn't think you were his friend, and if he didn't care about you, do you think we would see him as much as we do now? Why, if I had to say so, I think Falco would be in a very critical state of mind without you," Fox didn't say anything, but quietly stared forward with heavy, tear dripping eyes. Peppy hesitated, but then gently touched his shoulder. Fox didn't yank away this time, "Fox, you and Falco have a very strong friendship that will never break. I have a feeling that you two went grow old and die together, side by side,"

Fox sniffled hard and hic-upped softly. He rubbed at his eyes and took a shaky breath, "I-I miss him so much...!"

"I know lad... I know," Peppy rubbed his shoulder and arm softly, wishing he could do more to comfort him, "Try to get some sleep now... I'm sure everything will be clear for you in the morning. Falco will be fine and come back again, just like he always does, and always will," Fox nodded a little. Peppy gave a sad little smile then reached across the bed to close the blinds on the window.

"D-don't," Fox said, shifting to look back at the window. His eyes glowed with tears from the light that came in, "I-I want to see if he comes back..."

Peppy looked down at him but nodded, "Of course," He stood up and pulled the covers over Fox more as the younger man curled up on the bed again, facing the large window. "Sleep well, Fox," he said quietly then walked to the door. He paused and looked back at him, but frowned and left, closing the door behind him quietly.


	2. Where Are You?

"Fox, hurry up!" Slippy shouted from the kitchen.

Fox ran out of his room, putting on his jacket as he did, "I'm coming!" Slippy and he dashed down the hall and to the hangers. Fox ran over to his Arwing and quickly climbed in. He strapped himself in and got the plane warmed up.

Slippy appeared on a hologram screen in front of him, making Fox look down at it, "The others are already out and waiting," he said.

Fox nodded once, reaching up to turn on certain things, "Got it. Sorry I was late,"

"Rough night?" Slippy asked, tilting his head.

Fox paused but he flipped the switch his hand was hovering over, "I've had better. I'll meet you guys out there. Fox out," he said and turned off the hologram. He put a hand on his head and closed his head. It was throbbing with a nasty hangover and all he wished he could do was curl up in bed and go back to sleep, but he had to be on his A game, Falco or no Falco.

He took a deep breath then grabbed the controls. He turned his plane towards the launch ramp and thick steel plates slowly raised behind his plane. Slowly, his Arwing roared to life and fire started to burn out of its thrusters. Suddenly, he was launched forward from zero to a hundred in less than a second. He winced as his head throbbed from the sudden rush, but he gripped the controls tighter and bit through the pain. As soon as he was out of the tunnel, he jerked the controls to the right, getting his plane to cut right without any trouble at all.

Fox followed Slippy to where the others were waiting for them.

"Found him!" Slippy said over the radio as they got closer and slowed to float near the other planes.

"About time!" Krystel said from her plane, "What were you doing back there?" she asked, looking over at Fox's Arwing though she couldn't see him through the glass of his plane.

"Over slept," Fox said, rubbing his temple with one hand. He closed his eyes for a moment then opened them again, "Forgot to set my alarm last night,"

"Well that's no matter," Peppy said before Krystel or Slippy could pester him anymore, knowing the boy would have a killer hangover from all he drank last night, "Let's just get to practicing. There's an asteroid field not far from here we can practice in,"

"I hate asteroids!" Slippy whined.

"I know, but it's the best we've got," Peppy said then turned his plane and started off to the field. Everyone soon followed.

Practice went on as normal, though Fox was a little slow. He would find himself spacing out or getting a mind splitting headache sometimes, and he would have to pause for a moment to gain his focus back.

"Fox, you sure you're ok to be out here?" Krystel asked, "You seem out of it,"

"I'm fine," Fox said, having a hand to his head, "Just give me a sec. I didn't get much sleep last night,"

"Yes, why don't we all take a break," Peppy said, slowing his Arwing to a stop.

"Sounds good to me!" Slippy said excitedly as he stopped, "Lunch time!"

Fox groaned at the mention of food, feeling his stomach clench. He leaned back in his seat, slouching slightly. Closing his eyes, he just relaxed, dosing off slightly.

After a while, they got back to practice. Fox was weaving and spinning through different asteroids, gritting his teeth so he didn't through up whatever was in his stomach. They blew up a few asteroids, pretending they were enemy ships. Fox blew up one and flew right through the hole he made in it, doing a spin to turn back around when he was out.

"Alright! You go Fox!" Slippy cheered.

"Yes, I do say that was a beautiful shot," Peppy said, "I think Wolf will think twice about attacking once he sees how well you're doing,"

Fox paused a moment. He expected to hear Falco say he did good, but that he could do better in that cocky way he did, but he didn't. He frowned and closed his eyes a moment before looking forward again, "Thanks," he said in a dull tone and slowed his plane down slightly when he was in a clear patch of sky.

He leaned back in his seat and ran a hand up through his fur. He leaned his head back and turned it to look out the side of his window at the empty space and stars. He wondered where Falco was right now, and what he was doing. He always worried when he went out like this. He almost tried to call him on radio, but he knew it would be pointless. He wouldn't answer.

Fox closed his eyes, resting his hands in his lap. How long would he be gone this time? Last time he felt, he was gone almost four months. Would he be come six this time? Ten? A whole year? Fox really hoped not. He would go insane if that were the case.

"Fox! Watch out!" Fox suddenly heard Slippy shout over the radio.

Fox jumped and his eyes widened. He looked around but then forward. He let out a gasp as his eyes widened even more. His plane was speeding towards a large asteroid. He grabbed his controls to maybe to shoot through it, but it was too close. The pieces would break the glass. He yanked back hard on the control, getting the engines to roar in a high pitched away. The Arwing started to tilt back quickly but it wasn't quick enough. The nose of his plane hit the asteroid, making red lights flash in the cockpit. Fox shouted as he shot forward, but his belt caught him. He let out a louder, pained shout when something in his chest made a loud cracking sound. He coughed, making blood hit the front of the window shield.

"Fox!" Krystel shouted, her eyes wide.

Fox's plane flipped, making the top of the plane smash onto the rock face of the asteroid. He put his arms over his head and ducked down to avoided hitting the rock. A large piece of rock broke off and smash into his arm, making it crack and him shout. He suddenly gasped for air, but it all rushed out and into space. He quickly grabbed a mask and took a deep breath. He grabbed a lever and yanked on it hard with his good arm, grunting as he did. A pod suddenly surrounded him and he was shot out of his place. When he did, his head hit the back of the pod hard, making everything go black, then soon, nothing.


	3. He Needs You

Fox grunted in pain when he started to come around. He heard a voice echo in the distance and he opened his eyes. There was a very bright light and three black figures spinning around. He groaned and closed his eyes again. Slowly, the voice started to come closer and clearer.

"F...o...x... Fo...x Fox... Fox! Fox, can you hear me?"

Fox slowly blinked his eyes open again. The figures stopped spinning and he discovered that Peppy, Krystel, and Slippy were all leaning over him with wide eyes. He stared up at them.

"Oh thank goodness!" Krystel said, "He's awake!"

"Wh-what... where...?" Fox said in a hoarse voice as he squinted his eyes and looked around.

Peppy out a hand on his shoulder, "Relax, you're back at base. We're in the clinic right now. Don't move around a lot though. You took some pretty nasty blows out there," he explained.

Fox stared up at him but then looked down at himself. He was laying on one of the white beds in the clinic with only his pants on. His chest was wrapped up in bandages and so was the side of his arm. He groaned as he pained came back to him and he rested his head back, closing his eyes. With his good hand, he touched his head, "God..." he mumbled, "I feel like I was hit by a train..."

"You basically were," Slippy said, "That asteroid was huge!"

Fox slowly opened his eyes and looked up at his friends, "I'm sorry... I don't know what came over me..."

Peppy shook his head, "Don't be sorry. You're just a bit stressed, that's all. Why don't you take a break for a while?"

"Y-yeah, ok..." even if his Arwing was still working, he couldn't fly with these injuries.

Peppy helped Fox to his room and laid him down on his bed.

Fox looked up at his friends, "Thank you," he said quietly.

Krystel smiled, "Hey, someone has to take care of you,"

Fox nodded but then closed his eyes. Peppy turned and motioned for everyone to leave the room. He closed the door behind them.

A while later, Peppy knocked lightly on his door, carrying some medicine and a bottle of water in one hand, "Fox?" he called through the door but he didn't get an answer, "Fox?" he said again and opened the door. He looked around but found that he wasn't in his room. He frowned in confusion and closed the door again. He stood in the hall a moment, but then gave a small smile. He walked down the hall to Falco's room and opened the door. He found Fox sitting up criss-crossed on the bed and facing the window.

"Falco's room has a window," Fox said when he heard the door open, already knowing who it was.

Peppy walked inside and closed the door behind him, "You should be laying down and resting," he said, walking over to him. Fox only shrugged. Peppy sat on the edge of the bed and opened the bottle, after setting the bottle down on one of the shelves above Falco's bed. He tapped it against his palm, shaking two pills out of it then closed it again, "Here, you need to take this," he said, turning his body slightly to look at Fox.

"I don't need them," Fox said, not looking at him.

Peppy sighed, "Fox, please don't make me make you take them... It's for your benefit. They'll help you heal faster, as well as dull the pain,"

Fox didn't say anything for a long moment but he then looked down at the pills in Peppy's hand. He took them and popped them in his mouth, then took the water and gulped them down, all with his good arm.

"There, that wasn't so hard, was it?" Peppy asked but Fox just looked back out the window again. Peppy set the bottle of water a side then pulled something out of his pocket, "Here, I have something for you,"

"I don't want it,"

"You don't even know what it is, Fox," he held out small tape recorder. Fox looked down at it, then picked it up when his curiosity got to him.

"What is it?" he asked, tilting his head and turning the recorder over.

"It's a tape recorder. I know it's a bit out dated, but it gets the job done," he said, "It's used to record your voice. I know you have a lot of thoughts and feelings you don't want to sure with me, or anyone else for that matter, but it helps to talk about it. So instead of talking to yourself, you talk to this and it records it. It's like a digital journal, just without the pages and a pen,"

Fox stared down at it but then set it down in front of him, "Thank you," he said.

"You're welcome. I'll drop off some more tapes in the morning for you," Peppy stood and started towards the door, "Try to get some rest, alright, Fox?" he said, looking back at him. Fox didn't say anything and was just staring out the window again. Peppy watched him then sighed and walked out, closing the door behind him.

A few days turned into a few weeks, than a few months. Fox's bones where healed now but he still had very nasty bruises. He started using the tape recorder Peppy gave him too. At first, he thought it was a stupid idea, but he found he felt better when he got to talk all his emotions out. He only made a few recordings the first month, and was feeling much better, but as more and more month piled on, he started to make more, feeling those depressed feeling come back again. He didn't want to go out and fly anymore after Slippy fixed his ship, he didn't want to hang out with his friends, or eat much of anything. Everyone was starting to get really worried about him.

One late night, Peppy peeked into Falco's room, where Fox had taken shelter again. He walked inside and looked the boy over with a frown. He sighed and stood up straight again. Fox wasn't looking all that great anymore. His fur was dull instead of the soft and shiny coat it used to be. He was skinnier too.

"Oh Fox..." Peppy whispered to himself. He stared down at the sleeping fox for a moment then turned to leave, but his foot tapped something. He looked down to see a cardboard box sticking out from under the bed. He tilted his head then knelt down and pulled it out. He found several tapes that Fox has used. He glanced up at the sleeping pilot, then picked up the box and went back to his room.

He knew this went against everything he stood for when it came to privacy, but he had to know what was going on inside Fox's head right now.

After any hours, Peppy was frowning deeply, looking extremely worried, "This isn't good..." he said quietly to himself, "This isn't good at all..." he stood and picked up the box. He went to the hanger and pulled out a tracking bot from a box. He turned it on and wrapped the box up, placing it in the bot's holding compartment when a note.

"I don't care how hard you need to travel," Peppy told the bot, "But you need to find Falco as quickly as possible. Give him these right away, and don't take no for an answer. Tell him it's a very important matter dealing with Fox. That should break him," The bot nodded then flew off. Peppy watched it go then looked up at the ceiling, "Lord save us all..." he said quietly.


	4. Ice Demons

Falco spun the keys to his Arwing around his finger as he walked into a Space Motel to rest. He got himself a room in the main office then walked back out and started towards his room, but he stopped when something caught his eye. He looked up and caught his keys. He watched as a tracking bot flew up to him. It was trembling slightly from flying or so long.

"M-message for Mr. Lombardi," the robot said.

"What the hell?" Falco said, crossing his arms, "Who are you from?"

"Mr. Hare sent me to find you. I-I carry a very important message from him,"

Falco turned away and started walking again, stuffing his hands into his pockets, "I don't want it. Take it back to him,"

"B-but Mr. Lombardi!" the robot followed him.

"I said take it back!" Falco shouted, glaring over his shoulder at the bot.

"I-It's about Mr. McCloud!"

Falco stopped at that and frowned deeply. He didn't say anything for a long moment, "How important is it?" he asked, his voice was low and serious.

"Very important! Mr. Hare looked very frightened, very pale! His hands were shaking too!" the tracker explained.

Falco looked away. That wasn't like the Peppy he knew. Peppy was always calm, cool, and collected. He rarely ever got worked up this bad. Falco turned around, "Alright, hand it over," The robot nodded once and took the package out of his compartment. Falco looked down at the box then back up at the robot, "Go back and tell him I got it," The bot nodded again and flew off. Falco then turned and walked to his room.

Once inside, Falco sat on the bed and sighed. His shifted to sit criss-crossed and put the box in front of him. He cut the tape and opened it. He raised an eyebrow at the tape and sighed, "Leave it to Peppy to send me something ancient..." He mumbled then picked up the note. It read:

"_Falco, I know that when you got out, you need your space and time to think, but this is too important to ignore. I gave Fox a tape recorder to help him through the time you weren't here, but I've discovered that he's in a much worse state than I thought. I know that if I would have just wrote you, you wouldn't believe me when I tell you that he isn't well, but these tapes will help you to believe. Please, if you're reading this, you need to listen to these. Listen past the first month. What you choice to do with the knowledge after that is up to you._

_ -Peppy Hare,"_

Falco frowned and set the note aside. He looked down at the tapes but then grabbed a tape with the earliest date and put it into the tape player. He leaned back against the headboard of his bed and pressed play.

Suddenly, Fox's voice started to play:

"_Um..."_ he started awkwardly, "_So, Peppy gave me this tape recorder thing. He said it would help make me feel better or something. I figured I'd give it a try, just for him._

_"It's only been a few days now that Falco's been gone. I kinda feel stupid for missing him so much. I know he can handle himself out there, he's a better pilot then I'll ever be, but... I guess what really bothers me is that I can't do anything to help him. He always goes out every year or so to find himself, but I feel like I should be able to help him find what he's looking for. I mean, we are best friends, right?"_

Fox sighed and there was a sliding sound on the tape recorder. Falco guessed Fox was shifting around or something, "_Peppy says that it's something he just needs to do on his own, but I wish Falco didn't feel that way. We've been friends for years, and I know he has a hard time talking about stuff that relates to him and how he's feeling, but best friends are supposed to tell each other everything. I tell him everything. I feel like such an awful friend._

_"Maybe I'm being too hard on myself... It's only been a few days since he left. Maybe things will get better,"_

The player clicked when the tape ended. Falco sighed and took the tape out, "Such an idiot," he said to himself but grabbed the next one and put it in, which was dated a week later. He pressed play.

"_I hate to say it, but using this recorder really helps,"_ Fox started, sounding much better than he did in the last one, "_Peppy was right, like he normally is. And my injuries have started to heal!"_

Falco tilted his head at that, "Injuries?" he said quietly to himself

"_Peppy says that the bones in my chest and arm should be heal enough to where the pain isn't so back in about four weeks. He said I'll have the bruises for a while though. They look pretty bad. Slippy said that he was almost done fixing my Arwing, but I think it just said that to try and make a me feel better. It doesn't look anywhere near complete. God, I know Falco would murder me if he found out I crashed into an asteroid,"_

_"_He did what?" Falco shouted, sitting up straight, "What the hell is that stupid idiot doing?"

"_Tonight we're going to play some games, to try and cheer everyone up. I know it won't be the same without Falco, but I think we can do it,"_

The player clicked again and Falco growled, "When I get my hands on him..." He put in the next tape and listened. The next few sounded like Fox was just fine. Falco wouldn't have even listened to the rest if the note hadn't said to.

Falco grabbed a tape from two months into the recording and put it into the player. He sighed and pressed play.

This time, instead of Fox talking right away, Falco heard him sniffling and making a little pained sound. Falco sat up straighter, blinking a few times.

"_I-It's been two months now," _Fox started, his voice a little shaky, "_Ah, and, it's getting harder, but I don't want to give up. G-god," _ there was a long pause and another sniffle, "_What would Falco say if he saw me like this? Well... he'd either tell me to suck it up, or start being really worried, but still. I need to be strong. _

_"I don't know why it's so hard this time. He's felt at least three times before and it hasn't been this hard. I-I asked Peppy about it, and he said it was because Falco and I have a really strong friendship, and I'm just worried about him. I can't say that I'm not worried, but I was worried those other times too. Why is this one so different?"_

Fox sighed, "_I wish he would just come home and stay home..."_

The recorder clicked, but Falco just stared down at it a moment. After a while, he put the next one in. For the next four months worth of tapes, Fox started to sound worse and worse. It made Falco frown and his heart ache. He balled his hands into fists and gritting his teeth, but grabbed the last one. This one was dated just about a week ago from the present time. He put it in and hesitated to press the play button, afraid as to what he would hear, but he finally did.

There was a long pause at the beginning before Fox started to talk, "_I sit here, every night, and now, every day, staring out into the blackness that is space... I watch for him, waiting to see his Arwing fly back to base... Sometimes, I'll have dreams about it, but I'll wake up on the cold floor of the hanger... Peppy finds me every morning and takes me back to Falco's room, because I like the window. He's worried, I know he is. I can see it on his face. He shouldn't worry about me. I'm no one to worry about. To worry about me would be just like... trying to count all the stars I stare at every day and night... Pointless..._

There was another long pause and Falco leaned forward. He put his elbows on his knees as his eyebrows came together in pained worry. He didn't speak though.

"_The glass is so cold..."_ Fox said quietly, "_Why is everything so cold? Has it always been this cold? No, it couldn't have been. This is so bitter, so... intoxicating, that it feels like it wraps around me and tries to strangle me. I've fought it off for the past six months, but now... I don't feel like fighting anymore... I'm so tired of fighting... _

_"When I stop to think about it, maybe the darkness that tries to take me every now and then, that Peppy and the other fight off, maybe... it's not a bad thing. Maybe, it's trying to help me. Maybe it wants to take me to a place where there isn't this bitter cold pain I feel every miserable second I sit here._

_"God, was it this hard for my dad? Did he have problems staying sane when he was locked away? Locked away with no one... just him and his thoughts... I wonder if he heard the demons too. Felt them wrap their icy fingers around him..._

_"I know I promised Falco that I would be there for him if he ever needed me, and that I would wait for him forever, but... I don't know how much longer I can do this... I'll fight, only for him now. I'll try my hardest, but... I don't think my hardest is good enough anymore..."_

The tape ended. Falco sat there a long moment, but then jumped up and grabbed his keys. He dashed out of his room and to his Arwing. As soon as he got in, he quickly turned on everything and dashed off like lightning


	5. All I'll Ever Dream

Peppy sat in the kitchen and sipped some tea. He looked tired, and he sighed, setting the cup down. He heard from the tracker bot that Falco had gotten the tapes, and only time would tell now what Falco would do with the information he had been given.

Peppy closed his eyes and rubbed his temples. He looked up when he heard a loud bang of a door, "For heaven's sakes, you don't need to slam things!" He called to whoever it was but his eyes widened when he saw Falco run into the kitchen. He stood up quickly, "Falco?"

Falco stopped and looked around wildly then at Peppy, "Where is he?" he panted then shouted, "Where is he?"

Peppy pointed down the hall, "H-he's in your room!"

Falco didn't stop to chat. He turned and dashed down the hall. Peppy quickly followed after, moving slower than Falco though. He saw Falco throw open his door and run inside. A loud thump was heard soon after. Peppy hurried to the doorway and looked inside.

On the floor, laid Falco with Fox in his arms. Fox sat on the ground and Falco was knelt over his legs. Falco held him tightly, almost like he was afraid to let him go. Fox's eyes were wide and he had his hands on Falco's back.

"Falco?" Fox said quietly, moving his head to look at him.

Falco wrapped his arms more around him and frowned deeply, "You dumb ass!" he shouted to try and cover the hurt in his voice, "What the hell do you think you're doing? You are my god damn best friend, and this is how I find you when I come back? I find you thin as a twig and practically lifeless?"

Fox blinked a few times but he smiled. He wrapped his arms more around his friend and closed his eyes, "Mmm... You are Falco... The real Falco..." he said quietly. For the first time in a long time, he looked very happy.

Peppy smiled and leaned against the door frame. Krystel and Slippy came out of their rooms and to the door.

"What's going on?" Krystel asked, peeking inside.

Slippy gasped, "Falco! He's back!" He shouted and moved to run to him but Peppy put out an arm, blocking his way. Slippy looked up at him.

"Now is not the time," Peppy said quietly, "Leave them alone for while. Give them a couple hours. Fox needs this," Slippy looked back at Falco, seeing Fox under him on the floor.

Krystel crossed her arms and smiled, "Who knew Falco was Fox's life source..." she said quietly, more than to herself than anyone.

Peppy smiled and stepped back, "Come, leave them be," He turned and walked down the hall, Slippy followed. Krystel stood there a moment.

"Maybe it wasn't me you needed, Fox," she whispered, "Maybe it was Falco all along," she stepped out into the hall, closing the door behind her quietly.

*~A Few Days Later~*

Fox and Falco sat in the hanger. There was a fold up table between then and cards laid out on the table.

Falco threw his down, "No way! You cheated!" He reached over and grabbed a grinning fox's wrist, making him drop his cards, "You gotta have cards hidden on ya! There ain't no way I would lose this many times to someone who sucks so bad as you!"

Fox laughed, which sounded very light and full of heart, much different than how it would have been a few days ago, "I did not cheat! Maybe you're just losing your grip!"

"Uh uh! I don't lose my grip this many times!" Falco shouted and threw Fox's wrist back at him. He crossed his arms, slouching in his chair.

Fox pulled the money pile to him, "You're just jealous of my amazing skill~,"

"Amazing skill my ass!"

Fox laughed again and picked up the cards and dealt them again. Falco watched him as he did. Fox had started eating again and was very slowly, gaining his weight back, but to Falco, he looked the best he had in years.

The falcon picked up his cards then tapped them on the table with one hand, resting his other elbow on the back of the chair, "I never told you about my adventure," he said after a while.

"No you didn't. Did you fight any aliens?" Fox said with a grin as he looked at his cards.

Falco chuckled, "If you count the space food aliens, then I fought a lot of them," Fox laughed at that, "But no, that was definitely not the high point of my time out," he smiled up at his friend, "Finding myself was,"

Fox looked up at him and tilted his head, "Oh yeah? And where did you find yourself? Saturn's rings?"

"Actually, no," Falco sat up and leaned across the table slightly, "Where I found myself, and everything I am, and ever will be, was right here," Falcon put a finger on Fox's chest, "Right here, all along,"

Fox blinked and he looked down at his finger but smiled up at him. He felt happiness swell up in his chest, "You sure? Cause there ain't much there," he said softly.

"Oh trust me. There is more here than anything else in the world... more love, more happiness, more hope... And you know what else is here?"

"What's that?"

Falco gave him a real smile. Not one of his cocky grins, but one that he never gave anyone. One that he only gave to show the person he was smiling at that he really cared about them, "My best friend..." he said softly.

Fox gave him one of his real smiles too, feeling like his heart would burst from how happy he felt to hear that. It meant more to him than anything else in the world. "I missed you, Falco. You won't leave again, right?" he asked.

Falco took his finger back and shook his head. He leaned back in his chair, "Why should I? I have everything I could ever dream of, right here across from me,"

Fox looked down, still smiling though, "You're getting so soft on me..." he said quietly.

"Enjoy it while it lasts, because it won't happen again," Falco said, just as quietly, but with a little bit of playfulness to it.

Fox looked back up at him, "Thank you Falco, for being my best friend," he said.

"And thank you Fox, for being the greatest thing that ever happened to me," Falco replied, tilting his head some.

**Author's Note:**

Hi~ Thanks for reading ^^ I hope you liked it. Sorry for any mistakes I didn't catch as I wrote this.

If you're interested as to why I titled it Iris, well, it's because when you give someone an Iris Flower, it means that you have strong, deep sentimental feeling for that person, so it goes perfect with the story 3

I DO NOT OWN STAR FOX!


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